Until July 1st, I am only allowed liquids, which really is as awful as is sounds. While I've done liquid diets before, I could always have something solid to break the monotony. This time around, I have to stick to it or I can risk causing myself pain. At least I have soft and blended food to look forward to in July.
If you're thinking of trying a liquid diet, check out these five things I've learnt from my most recent one:
Chewing isn't a right, it's a privilege
I've taken to freezing yoghurts and making ice lollies just so I can feel like I'm chewing something, even if I know it's all a lie. Chewing gum is also quickly becoming my best friend.
I'm pretty sure the highlight of someone's day shouldn't be getting to take a chewable multivitamin, but this is currently my life. At least pureed food is just around the corner.
Liquid diets are only fun if the liquid is wine or gin
I know I cut down on the booze over the last few months, but when you aren't allowed any at all, you start to really miss the odd glass of wine in a sunny beer garden.
A birthday is no fun without cake
In fact, at one point I considered blending up a birthday cake milkshake just so I could enjoy some cakey goodness, but then I realised that it wouldn't be the same and would probably leave me feeling a bit sad. If you want my advice, never try a liquid diet when you have a birthday coming up.
Soup is the worst when you don't eat meat
When you are on a diet that consists of soup as your only savoury option, this sucks. I'm so sick of cream of tomato or carrot and coriander that I never want to see another tin of soup again. Why can't people make things like french onion soup vegetarian? Sort your lives out soup people!
I'm pretty sure I can conquer the world now
I know that the future with a gastric band is likely to be difficult, but nothing can be harder than sticking to this diet for a month.